Hockey in BlondeSpeak - Shake That Rust Off, It's Hockey Time Again!

NHL hockey is back tomorrow! Need a little refresher course on the terminology you'll be hearing? Never fear, BlondeSpeak is here; to simplify all the gibberish you'll hear. (Yes, I took a poetry course during the lockout, specializing in dirty limericks; but that's for another post on another day.)

If you are a little rusty, brush up on your hockey terms so you know what's going on while you listen to Joe and Locker (or whoever your particular commentators are for your team if you're not a Washington Capitals fan. Wait...if you aren't a Caps fan, how the heck did you end up here?) And remember, BlondeSpeak is not meant to be technical, it's just the basics in simple language, you know, for blondes and wanna-be blondes.

Anyway, here we go:

Attacking zone: Ok, this is kinda a no-brainer, but maybe you’re not sure. So, when a team is on the attack, their attacking zone is between the opponent's blue line and goal line.

Breakaway: A player in control of the puck has a breakaway when the only opponent between him and the opposition's goal is the goalie and there is a reasonable scoring opportunity. You’ll hear this often, but sometimes it goes pretty quick and you miss the actual execution.

Charging: No, it has nothing to do with a credit card. It’s when the "actions of a player or goalkeeper who, as a result of distance traveled, shall violently check an opponent in any manner”. So in this case “distance traveled” is akin to something like more than three strides before deliberately smashing the living sh*t out of him. Pretty broad interpretation allowed for the refs here, no wonder so many coaches argue when it happens. Oh yeah, it can also result in a game misconduct or a suspension if the infraction is deemed severe enough. Really broad interpretation allowed, hope there are good ref’s on the ice…Yeah, right.

 Dump and chase: “An offensive strategy used to get the puck over the opposing team's blue line and into the corners where players can race to get it, thereby moving the play into the attacking zone”. Basically, they dump the puck down the ice and everybody chases after it. Simple, right?

 Freezing the puck: Nope, it is not putting the puck in the icebox before the game. Well, on second thought, it could be that too. Actually, a player freezes the puck by holding it against the boards with the stick or skates. A goalie freezes the puck (when the opposition is threatening to score) by either holding the puck in the glove or trapping it on the ice.

 Half Boards (or half walls): The half boards are not the short wall around the rink. It really is an actual specific location. It’s the areas along the side boards, half-way between the blue line and the goal line.

Odd-man Rush: Sounds like a dance, right? An odd-man rush happens when the team with the puck has one more player entering the other team’s zone then the other team’s defense (i.e. 2 on 1 or 3 on 2)

Offside: When a player crosses the attacking blue line before the puck does, the team is called for offside. A face-off then takes place just outside that blue line (in the offending player's defensive zone). The determining factor in most offside situations is the position of the skates: both skates must be completely over the blue line ahead of the puck for the play to be offside. That’s why you’ll sometimes see a player standing on either side of the line waiting for the puck; he's getting as close as he can get without going over. Yeah, sometimes that plan doesn't exactly pan out.

The Point: The point is the area just inside the opposition's blue line close to the boards on either side of the rink. Usually a defenseman usually parks himself there when his team is in control of the puck in the opposition's defensive zone. Playing the point has some responsibilities. It includes trying to keep the puck in the offensive zone when the defensive team attempts to clear it; receiving a pass from the forwards to allow the play to reset, and taking slap shots at the goal, hoping to create a rebound or a deflection. On the power play, however, one of the positions is often played by a forward and he attempts to control where the puck goes through passing, and also takes lots of shots. LOTS of shots if he can.

 Referee's crease: Yes, there actually is a referee’s crease! It’s the semi-circular area at the red line, beside the scorekeeper's bench, which a player may not enter when it’s occupied by a referee during a stoppage of play. Ever notice how players hang back when refs are conferring about a play or on the phone for a ruling from Toronto? Yeah, the ref’s in HIS crease and nobody better enter it. If they do, the player could get a misconduct penalty, but usually the ref politely asks the player to move his ass away. (I just threw this in because I thought it was interesting, you’ll probably never hear any reference to it during a game, ok?)

 The Shots: There are three common shots you’ll see and hear about, sometimes it’s hard to tell the difference and you have to trust the commentator to tell you what you just saw. But, here are the very basic descriptions of them. You’ll understand them better if you watch the replays or rewind your DVR and slow the action down:

            Slap shot: A slap shot occurs when the player swings the stick back and then quickly forward, slapping the puck ahead with a forehand shot. It’s a forceful shot, usually with a big wind up, where the player bends his stick on the ice and allows the energy stored in bending the stick to launch the puck forward.

            Wrist shot: A wrist shot is when a player shoots the puck off the blade of the stick with a flicking motion of the wrist. Normally a shot with accuracy and quick delivery. Wicked Wrister!

            Snap shot: A snap shot is a like an abbreviated slap shot, and combines the advantages of the wrist shot (speed and accuracy) and the slap shot (force).

The Slot: This is the area directly in front of the goalie’s crease between the face off circles. It is the prime scoring area up the middle of the ice, between the face-off circles. When a player is said to  "clear the slot," he’s shoving an opposing player out of the area in front of his goal.

 

 

Hockey in BlondeSpeak - Stats

Do you understand exactly what you are reading when you look at a player’s or team’s stats? Rather than ignore those acronyms and numbers, let’s break it down so you can get a better appreciation for them.
There is a lot of information involved here, so grab a cuppa joe or a cold beer and settle in.

First off – Player stats: I’m going to use the stats for Alex Ovechkin from the Caps website as posted on 11/1/10.

You should know some of the basics by now; GP = Games Played, G = Goals, A = Assists, so lets look at the others.

P = Points. Easy- goals plus assists equals points. It ain’t calculus, just simple addition.

+/- = Plus/Minus. As covered in a previous BlondeSpeak post, think of it like a grading system for players. Basically, it indicates whether they were on the ice when the opposing team scored (a minus) or on the ice when their own team scored (a plus). For example, a defenseman could be on the ice when the opposing team scored 4 goals (-4), but if that same defenseman also scored a goal (+1), his total +/- for the game would be -3.

PIM = Penalty Minutes. So far, Alex had incurred 10 penalty minutes

PP = Power Play Goals. That’s the number of goals the player has scored on the Power Play, Alex has 2.

SH = Shorthanded Goals. The number of goals the player has scored while the team was on the penalty kill/shorthanded. Looks like Alex needs a shorty in his stats.

GW = Game Winning Goals. Speaks for itself, Alex has had 3 in the last 11 games. Good Job Alex!

S = Shots on Goal. As could be expected, Alex has attempted 57 shots on goal so far this season. But, it would be nice if more resulted in actual goals if you factor in this - S%. 

S% = Shooting Percentage. That’s the total of goals divided by shots on goal. If Alex had only made 1 goal in 4 attempts, his S% would be 25%, since he’s made 7 goals in 57 attempts, it’s 12.3%

Additional Player stats from the NHL website, not including Goalies:

OT = Overtime Goals. Do I really need to explain this? Ok, Alex had 1 overtime goal so far.

TOI/G = Time on Ice per Game. Usually your defensemen have the most time on ice per game.

Sft/G = Average shifts per game. So far, Alex has averaged 20.3 shifts in 11 games. Once again, usually your defensemen have the highest number when it comes to average shifts per game. C'mon, do I need to explain that there are 4 offensive lines but only 3 defensive lines, therefore, more ice time for defense? Oh wait, I just did.

FO% = Faceoff Win Percentage. Well, since Ovi doesn’t do faceoffs, (or hasn’t yet), he hasn’t won any, has he? That is the job for the Center (like Backstrom or Stecks).

Next up – Goalie stats:

GPI = Games Played in Net. You might also see this as GP for Games Played. No brainer.

GS = Games Started. Also a no brainer, but if you are really blonde, what is shown above tells us that Varly only started in 1 game, but, since the GPIshown above is 2, it means he relieved Neuvy once.

MIN = Minutes played. This stat includes overtime minutes and deducts time when the team has played with an empty net.

GAA = Goals Against Average. Big clue here, the lower the number, the better.

W = Wins, L = Losses, OT = Overtime losses

SO = Shutouts. (I’m hoping I don’t have to explain what a shut out is, right? Please say yes, or just nod your head)

SA = Shots Against. How many times the opponents fired the puck at your goalie. Duh!

GA = Goals Against and SV = Saves. You know these, right?

SV% = Save Percentage. Real important number here for the goalie. Divide the number of saves by the number of shots against. Hint: Neuvy’s .926 save percentage puts him at #2 in the league as of 11/1/10. This is a good thing

G = Goals, A = Assists, and PIM = Penalty Minutes. Doesn’t happen often, but goalies can get goals, be credited with assists, and be assessed penalty minutes. If a goalie IS assessed a penalty, another member of the team sits it for him, just so you know. (BTW, former Caps goalie Jose Theodore has a goal on his lifetime stats)

TOI = Total Time on Ice. (another no brainer)

Finally – Team Stats:

Individual Team Stats by Game:

H/R = Home or Road

DEC = Decision (Win or Loss)

O/S = Overtime/Shootout

OPP = Opponent

RECORD = The teams’ current record. Caps are 7-4-0 at this time. (That would be 7 wins-4 losses-0 overtime losses)

GF = Goals For and GA = Goals Against. (The Calgary game, we scored 7 and Calgary scored 2.)

PPG = Power Play Goals (by us)

PP OPP = Power Play Opportunities (times we were on the power play)

PPGA = Power Play Goals Against (PP goals by "them")

TS = Times Shorthanded (we were on the penalty kill)

SHGF = Shorthanded Goals For (while we were on the power play)

SHGA = Shorthanded Goals Against (while we were on the penalty kill)

SF = Shots For

SA = Shots Against

ATT = Attendence

W GOALIE = Winning Goalie

W Goal = Winning Goal scored by…

Teams Stats within their Division:

GP, W, L, and OT were explained above. (or have you forgotten already?)

PTS = Points. Teams get 2 points for every win, and 1 point if the team loses in overtime.

GF = Goals For, GA = Goals Against, DIFF = Difference, HOME = Home record, AWAY = Away Record, SHOOTOUT = Shootout record, L10 = Last 10 games, STREAK = Winning or Losing streak. These are all pretty self-explanatory here, by this point, you should have been able to figure them out.

So, now you know all there is to know about what ALL those stats stand for. Does your brain hurt yet?

Just keep in mind, you don’t HAVE to know all these stats, but it helps to know a few of them. Wouldn’t it be cool to spout off a few of them to the guys around the water cooler and actually know what you are talking about? Bet you might even teach them a thing or two. Well, probably not, but you’ll still look cool, which is a good thing.



Hockey in BlondeSpeak - Icing

Ok, I did say I would save this for a post on another day. Guess now is as good a time as any. Oh, and all of you readers that think I’m talking about the frosting that goes on top of cupcakes for the media at Kettler, get out of the kitchen and out to the rink, pronto!

Anyway, I have read everything I can find on the web about it and can see why some people may still be doing puppy dog head tilts when they try to understand what the heck icing is. So, here we go.

First, let’s look at what the NHL rules say:

Rule 81 - Icing

81.1 Icing – For the purpose of this rule, the center red line will divide the ice into halves. Should any player or goalkeeper of a team, equal or superior in numerical strength (power-play) to the opposing team, shoot, bat or deflect the puck from his own half of the ice beyond the goal line of the opposing team, play shall be stopped.

For the purpose of this rule, the point of last contact with the puck by the team in possession shall be used to determine whether icing has occurred or not. As such, the team in possession must “gain the line” in order for the icing to be nullified. “Gaining the line” shall mean that the puck (not the player’s skate) must make contact with the center red line in order to nullify a potential icing.

For the purpose of interpretation of the rule, “icing the puck” is completed the instant the puck is touched first by a defending player (other than the goalkeeper) after it has crossed the goal line and if in the action of so touching the puck, it is knocked or deflected into the net, it is no goal.

Any contact between opposing players while pursuing the puck on an icing must be for the sole purpose of playing the puck and not for eliminating the opponent from playing the puck. Unnecessary or dangerous contact could result in penalties being assessed to the offending player.

The puck striking or deflecting off an official does not automatically nullify a potential icing.

Yeah, that clears everything up! Are you just as confused as before you started reading? Of course you are, I would be too.

Now, let’s look at what about.com has to say:

Definition: Shooting the puck to the end of the ice from behind the center ice red line.

If the puck crosses the opposing goal line untouched, and is then retrieved by an opposing player, icing is called.

Considered a delaying tactic, it results in a stoppage in play and a faceoff in the offending team's defensive zone.

If, in the opinion of the linesman, any player of the opposing team is able to play the puck before it passes his goal line, but does not do so, the linesman can "wave off" icing, allowing play to continue.

The purpose of the rule is to encourage continuous action. Referees and Linesmen interpret and apply the rule to produce that result.

Well, that’s a little better, but let’s go "blonde":

When it comes to understanding icing, imagine this scenario: Caps and Pens are playing hot and heavy in front of the Pens’ net. The Penguins can’t get the puck away from the Caps and are getting frustrated. Finally one Penguin gets a hold of the puck and sends it flying down the ice away from his own goal because they just can’t finesse it away any other way. Now, everybody takes off down the ice towards the Caps net while the puck skids past the red center line, the next blue line, all the way down past the red goal line across the end of the rink and nobody has caught up with it yet. Now, if a Pens player reaches the puck first, the play continues. If a Caps player reaches it first, it’s an icing call against the Pens. The puck is returned for a face off back down at the other end of the rink, kinda back where they started.

A couple things to remember here:

If your team is tired and frustrated, icing the puck will not give you a chance to make a shift change, that’s a no-no per the NHL rules. Too bad, what a waste.

Secondly, if the Pens were playing shorthanded at the time, that desperate measure of whacking the puck down the rink is not icing. Well, they were already being penalized, right?

Finally, a ref can wave off the icing call if they feel the Caps players could have gotten the puck and simply opted not to do so. Total judgement call by the refs.

So, in brief, if your guy whacks the puck down the ice because his defense just can’t seem to get the job done, you better hope someone from your team gets down the ice and gets that sucker before the other team does. Otherwise, you’re screwed…Any questions?

Hockey in BlondeSpeak – Terminology

Maybe there are some terms you hear commentators use and don’t quite know what they mean. Almost everyone who follows the game can figure out some of them; such as a "biscuit in the basket" is the term used for a goal, or possibly the "sin bin", which is another term for the penalty box. But if you are remotely new to ice hockey there might be a few that have you tilting your head like a puppy dog and a proverbial question mark in your mind. Here are a few. If I didn’t cover one you’ve always wondered about, feel free to comment and I’ll do my best to “BlondeSpeak” it for you.

Blade. No, they don’t mean the skate blade, it’s the flat section of a hockey stick that contacts the puck.

The Blocker. Nope, it’s not the guy who gets in the way, it’s the glove on the hand that the goalie uses to hold his stick, it has a flat pad on the front to block shots; hence, blocker.

Breakaway. Sorry to say, commentators aren’t talking about a song here, and if you know the song of which I speak, you need a heavy infusion of hard rock, I’m just saying. A breakaway is a scoring opportunity where the skater with the puck is behind the opposing defensemen and faces only the goaltender, he kind of ‘breaks away’ from the pack as it were.

Cherry Picking (or a Cherry Picker). No again, it’s not referring to a delightful summer pastime or a truck for fixing electrical and/or telephone lines. Basically, a cherry picker is a player who just hangs out, often close to the goal, waiting for a pass so he can have a breakaway. I would like to name a few cherry pickers here, but I’ll be nice.

Cross-checking. Technically, cross-checking is hitting an opponent with the stick while it is held in both hands and no part of the stick is touching the ice. Think of it as a swing and a hit (if you’ll permit me to slide a baseball term in here) by one player on another.

Dangler. Ah, I know what you all want this to mean. Clean up those filthy minds, people! A Dangler is a player who has exceptionally good stick handling skills and can easily fool opposing players.

Deke. Simply put, it’s faking out an opponent, to get around him or score on a goalie. There are shoulder dekes, stick dekes and head dekes.

Dipsy Doodle. A Dipsy Doodle is just a term for a fancy deke. (For Caps fans, you’ll recognize this term, Craig Laughlin loves to use it).

Drop Pass. Nope, not a pick up line in a bar that gets no results. In hockey, it’s a pass where a player simply leaves the puck behind him on the ice for a teammate to pick up. When done correctly, the puck stops moving and the pass's receiver catches up to it.

Icing. Ah, the wonderful icing term. I’m gonna save that one for its own BlondeSpeak post because it’s a little more detailed and tricky to explain. Trust me I tried, it’s gonna take more than a simple sentence or two to explain it.

Laying on the Lumber. Another term where you need to get your minds out of the gutter, people! It’s just another term for slashing.

Off Wing. When you hear a commentator saying a man was playing off wing, it means wing who is on the side opposite than he usually plays, or shoots from the "wrong side" for his position. For example, a left wing stationed on the right wing’s side or a right-handed shooter playing left wing.

The Point. Nope, not where surfers find the best wave or the place go to when you want to make out with your boyfriend. It’s the spot on the rink inside the blue line where the defensemen hang out.

Plus-Minus. Think of it like a grading system for players. Technically, it’s a hockey statistic that can apply to a player (or an offensive or defensive line) indicating whether they were on the ice when the opposing team scored (a minus) or on the ice when their own team scored (a plus). For example; if a goal is scored against your team, the defensemen on your team that were on the ice when it happened get a minus.

Saucer Pass. No, not the kind of saucer under a teacup. If you thought that, you may just be too ladylike for hockey. A saucer pass is just an airborne pass from one player to another.

Slew Foot. This one is a type of nasty act that should result in a penalty. It’s the action of sweeping or kicking out a player's skate or tripping them from behind, causing them to fall backwards. Any player who resorts to this should get a slew foot in the arse.

Soft Hands. Now, you all can guess what I wish this meant, but no, it doesn’t. When a player is described as having soft hands, they are saying he has the skills to keep the puck under control, moving it easily back and forth with his stick in a relaxed way.

Stack the Pads. When the goalie drops down and lays on one side with one leg on top of the other, in essence creating a wall to block the puck from going into the net, it’s called stacking the pads.

Now, I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, this is not intended to be technical explanations of hockey terms. I’m not an expert. Watch a hockey game and when you hear those terms listed above thrown out there, you’ll have just enough knowledge to understand what is going on so you can sit back and enjoy one of the greatest sports there is…Any questions?